move along, there's nothing free to get here

I've been persistent in my struggle to draw a really julianny Julian and knowing my skills and limits I think this is probably as good as gets. This is both satisfiying and boring. I'm not sure if I will not look at this a few months later and think "ugh, gross". Maybe my next target/victim will be amazing Alexa - again. I'm so tired.
Or maybe I get more original in my artworks, or maybe I get a life. Because actually, instead of creating output, I feel more like pausing, taking a good close look at what I am and what I want to be, put those two in a pot, stir, add some spice, let it simmer and surprise everyone, including myself. That's super difficult tho, and it takes time I'm not sure I have. Let's just say I feel the urge to, metaphorically speaking, change the wallpaper at my place a tad too often, and tend to forget that wallpaper is just superficial decoration. I kinda wanna change, but I don't know how.

But I'm not always sad, I swear by mine honour! I will prove you some day soon.


  1. Call me a heretic and burn me at the stake because I know just about nothing about this Julian fellow, but your work is beautiful, as always and usual. Redundant as that is. (Though I have a feeling that makes up little for my first statement.)
    And we're all at that place in life sometimes. It's just... difficult to not get stuck in it. But please, remember to make what you become what you truly want to be, not--what you think would be a good idea that you don't particularly like.
    I'm horribly trite, aren't I.

    1. what im thinking right now is: how do you even bear this blog that is 78% drooling over this julian fellow?? i mean, i am fangirling like there's no tomorrow, and you have no idea who this is but keep reading? i am in awe, honestly! haha. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Julian_Casablancas, by the way.) and thank you. i am trying my best, and definitely agree- a blog post going in that direction may or may not appear here soon...

    2. It's not that I don't know who he is; as if anyone could help not knowing who he is after spending half an hour in your internet footprints, I simply know no more than what is stated on Wikipedia, which, in nearly every case, is nothing worth knowing. And... I read this because you unintentionally fascinate me, I love your writing, and I can admire and relate to you, and I think those are good enough reasons to stay around anyone. That makes sense enough, I hope?

    3. Yeah it does make sense, and thanks, that is a lovely thing to say, especially given my perpetual state of crisis. Sorry I got you a little wrong on Jules, I've gotta say though that it's pretty rewarding to get to know more about him than Wikipedia spits out, he's an extraordinary little butterfly.

    4. And butterflies are good, of course. I can't say that the music related to him is quite within my taste, but to each his own, you know. Unless someone has undeniably awful taste and you take it upon yourself to condemn/reform them into a decent human being, to better the state of the universe, which is totally valid as well. But that's an aside, so...
      I'm glad you understand. And I hope that perpetual state of crisis will sometime resolve itself into something more akin to everlasting joie de vivre, rather than this disagreeableness (which is an awkward word, but I'm sure you understand).


Don't be shy.